


Motionless - Part 7a

by WinterReadingerDixon67



Series: Motionless [10]
Category: Marvel, Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Humor, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Remembers, Captain America - Freeform, Comfort, Comfort/Angst, Domestic Fluff, Doubt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Family Fluff, Feels, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Heavy Angst, Humor, Hurt Bucky Barnes, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Sorry, Iron Man - Freeform, Light Angst, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Part 1, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Post-Civil War (Marvel), Protective Bucky Barnes, Scarlet Witch - Freeform, Self-Doubt, Some Humor, Steve Rogers Feels, To Be Continued, Twisted and Fluffy Feelings, Why Did I Write This?, falcon - Freeform, winter soldier - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-04
Updated: 2016-11-04
Packaged: 2018-08-29 00:35:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,674
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8469010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinterReadingerDixon67/pseuds/WinterReadingerDixon67
Summary: Reader gets shot in the back during a mission leaving her paralyzed from the waist down.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is a timeline of how things resolved throughout the year. Each month depicts what they’ve done and how they’re rebuilding up their relationship. It’s super long so I’m splitting it into two separate parts. Please watch the links, they'll be helpful. ;)

_ “Do you still love me James?” She sounded unsure, almost as if she was afraid I’d say no. I remove my hand from hers and cup her face gently, raising it up so I could look at her fully. Her eyes close as she leans into my hand, placing hers above mine.  _

_ “I never stopped loving you, (Y/N) and I never will.” I pulled her closer until our foreheads met. “I know it’s going to take time, but I will always love you, please don’t forget that.” I kiss her forehead, letting my lips linger there. My resolve almost melts as she does the same.  _

_ “Now go get some rest, doll, we have a lot of catching up to do tomorrow.” I lightly shove her out of the room, laughing as she stuck out her tongue at me. “Getting rid of me already, Barnes?” _

_ “Never doll, you’re stuck with me.” I replied by repeating her gesture.  _

_ “I love you, James.”  _

_ “I love you too, (Y/N), please don’t forget that.” _

_ “Never.”  _

_ She blew me a kiss before she slipped out, closing the door behind her. I knew it was going to be a long process for the both of us. Rebuilding our trust, mending the holes we left behind, but I knew we were going to be okay. That everything was going to be just fine. I just felt so relieved I found a light in the distance. A light to lead me out of the dark, to bring me back home.  _

* * *

 

Present:  **March**

 

_ Readers POV  _

 

You and Bucky made amends, slowly. The talk you had with him was very reassuring and gave you a little piece of mind. Of course, there was still the small voice in the back of your head that thought differently. Bucky’s been healing nicely, though Helen believed it was best to keep him in the infirmary a while longer to make sure everything was working fine. 

Two months, two extra months of seeing him laying on a bed as his body healed itself. You made it a habit of going down to see him everyday, let him know you actually still cared for him. Which you did, but there was definitely something bothering Bucky, you were sure of it. You didn’t want to push him in telling you, knowing he would when he was ready, but you were starting to doubt yourself. 

There would be days when you ended up finding yourself standing in the doorway of Bucky’s room, not fully entering it, just...reminiscing. The image of you leaving his room that night always plagued your mind, watching as your figure ran out the door and to your room. Leaving behind a broken man, who just had his life ripped away from him. Again. You slammed the door shut, the sound echoing down the hall. You leaned against the opposite wall, still staring at the door. You were so focused on the door, you never noticed someone stand next to you. 

“You know, if you concentrate hard enough, you can open the door?” You jump, letting out a scream as you clutched your chest. Steve was leaning on the wall where you once were, biting his lip in order to prevent himself from laughing. 

“Dammit, Steve! You nearly gave me a heart attack. What are you doing here anyways?” Asking him as you calmed yourself down. His face fell slightly, losing the twinkle in his eye that was there previously. 

“What’s with the door?” His chin jerking towards the door. You let your shoulders slump down, sliding down the wall until you were sitting on the floor, right in front of it. 

“Bucky wants to talk to me today, says that it’s important.” You tell him as he moves to sit next to you. 

“Then why aren’t you down there then? If you don’t mind me asking.” A few seconds passed before you spoke up. 

“I already know what he’s going to talk to me about. I mean, it’s to be expected. Considering what I did and what happened over the past few months.” Steve stayed quiet as you fiddled with the bottom of your shirt. You knew you had to have this conversation with him, you just weren’t ready for it to actually become a reality. 

“That’s actually why I’m here,” He turned to face you, “Bucky’s asking for you.” You nod in response, taking your time in standing up. 

“Well, better get down there then, before I make a mistake and screw things up again.” A hand on your shoulder stopped you from leaving, you faced Steve and let him pull you into his arms. 

“Just tell him everything, (Y/N) and remember what he told you, okay?” You stayed there for a while, as your thoughts calmed down a bit. You were going to go down there and talk with Bucky, you were going to listen to everything he had to say. 

_ ‘No secrets, no more lies. Everything out in the open.’  _ You knew this was going to be a rough road, but you were determined to fight for what you had left. 

* * *

 

_ Bucky’s POV _

 

I asked Steve if he could go find (Y/N) for me. She visited me every day, but the last few days there was no sign of her. Not being able to see her again after a period of time made me worry. Was she going to leave me again? Was the past few months a dream and she never came back at all? Is this a new mind trick Hydra is doing? My thoughts were interrupted when a soft knock came from the door. I look over to see her standing there, waiting for permission to enter. Which I found stupid, she never needed my permission to come in. 

“Hey (Y/N), you can come in you know.” She smiled slightly and moved to sit on the chair beside me. 

“Steve said you needed to talk to me about something?” She sat there quietly, patiently, her back was stiff. It was obvious something was bothering her, but I decided to wait on asking her. 

“I wanted to talk to you about how we’re going to move forward.” Her breath quickened, she took a few seconds to compose herself.

“I’m listening.” I sat up slowly, still a little sore and watched as the plates in my arm shift when I moved my hand. 

“I think it would be best if we didn’t live together...in the same...room. Tony had your things moved to a spare room.” I took a deep breath, thinking of how I should tell her without it sounding like a bad thing. “I don’t want you to think that I’m leaving you or breaking up with you, I just think we should start over. Have a fresh start, get to know each other again and put the past behind us.” I grew worried from her lack of response only to find out she was sitting there with a look of shock on her face. Great, now I messed it up. I didn’t want her to be scared by this, I just thought we needed time. There’s been so much hidden from the both us of, that we needed to learn to trust each other again. 

 

“(Y/N), please don’t think that-”

 

“Bucky, I understand,” she interrupted me, moving forward in her chair as she held my metal hand in hers, “we need to build up our trust again. And if that means I have to move out, I’ll do it. Plus, now Nat can finally have her room back.” The corner of her mouth twitches, then turning into a small grin. “It just means I’m not going to lose you.” I gave her hand a gentle squeeze, smiling softly at her. 

“You never lost me, (Y/N), we just grew…distant. My love for you never left.” She nodded slowly, taking a moment to think. She stood up and walked out the door, my face fell as I watched the door close behind her. My heart fell at what just happened. Seconds turned into minutes, minutes to hours. After an hour a knock came from the door, “Come in.” I replied softly, too devastated to look at the person who came in. The person cleared their throat and spoke. My head jerked towards them, eyes wide.

“Hi, I was told I would be able to find Mr. James Barnes here. He’s my date and I don’t want his coffee to get cold.” 

There stood (Y/N), standing in the doorway with coffees in her right hand and a bag in her left. She was wearing a loose floral dress, white flats and had her hair down in loose curls. She was all dolled up and she looked stunning. I sat up straighter, confused as to what was going on. 

“Uh...um..yeah, that’s me, I’m him.” She walked up to the side table and placed the stuff down, before smoothing out her dress. Her hand stuck out for me to take, not taking my eyes off her,  I took her hand in mine and shook it gently. 

“I’m (Y/N) (Y/L/N), Steve told me a lot about you.” I was so caught up in the moment I didn’t even realize I was still shaking her hand before put her other hand on mine. 

“Pleasure to meet you, ma’am, I’m James Barnes, but most people call me Bucky.” She smiled, not the small one she’d normally give me. But the one where it reached her eyes.

“It’s lovely to finally meet you, Bucky. I brought you coffee and some pastries if you’re hungry. I wasn’t sure how you liked your coffee, so I took a chance.” I took a sip of the coffee she offered me, the hot liquid ran down my throat. Black, with just a hint of cream, just the way I like it. I groan, raising the cup at her, “It’s like you know me already, it’s perfect.” She sits down and pulls out the pastries, placing them on napkins on the side of my bed. I watch her lovingly as she sets everything up. She got all dolled up for me, took her time to do this for me. I wouldn’t have cared if she came in wearing sweats and a hoodie, but the gesture didn’t go unnoticed. 

“Now (Y/N), since you found me, let’s get to know each other.” She wiped her hands on a napkin, taking a sip of her coffee as she sat back in her chair. 

 

“Want to play 20 Questions?”

 

For the rest of the day, we each asked each other a question. Sure we already knew the answers to them, but it was all part of the process. Taking the time to relearn each other. It ended up being longer than the normal average first date, but it was completely worth it. We talked well into the evening and decided on starting our second date that day, by ordering in. If you could see us, you would see two individuals chatting away into the night, laughing and having a good time. And you wouldn’t be wrong there, we were having the times of our lives. In fact, we were so focused on our conversation, we failed to notice the figures standing outside the room, with huge smiles on their faces.

* * *

 

**April**

 

_ Readers POV _

 

Weeks flew by so quickly the next month was already here. As promised, you and Bucky took it day by day. Leaving everything out in the open and most importantly, you both took your time. You both agreed to go out on a date at least once a week, hang out with the others, continue on missions and then at the end of the day go your separate ways to your own rooms. You wanted to savor every moment you had with him, not wanting to lose everything again. 

Bucky was going to be released the following month, after being cooped up in the infirmary for quite some time. And he was more than ready to leave that dreadful room. Even though he was going to be released, that didn’t mean he was off the hook just yet, he still had to be retrained in certain things. Go through physical therapy, build up his strength again. Of course, Steve was more than willing to take charge of that. If it gave him a chance to tease him and mess around with him, he’d take it. Bucky, on the other hand, was the opposite, he actually hated the idea. And complained all day and refused to talk to Steve. 

“But why does  _ Steve _ have to do it? Why can’t my beautiful girlfriend help me out?”

You held back a giggle as Bucky whined from the bed. His legs were spread out above the blankets, too hot to be underneath them. Since his body was regaining its strength, his temperature came back as well. So he was no longer cold, he was back to his normal human furnace self. You rested your elbow on his bed, balancing your head on your hand and stared at him. 

“Because, Bucky, he knows your limits and knows what’s best for you. Plus I actually might end up  _ hurting _ you if I ended up being the one to help you.” He looked down at you with his perfect blue eyes, a small pout on his lips. He was trying to convince you by pulling out his puppy dog face. Knowing you well enough you fell for it every time, except this time you were prepared. 

“Nope, sorry baby. That’s not going to work on me, not this time. Steve’s helping you and that’s that.” He huffed out in frustration, realizing he was never going to win a battle he couldn’t win. 

“Can you at least be there? Make sure I don’t die by the hands of my best friend,  _ please. _ ” He sat up now, crossing his legs on the bed, his face begging you to at least agree to this. But how could you refuse the adorable face you grew to love so much. 

“Fine, you convinced me. I’ll be there when Steve tries his best not to kill you.” He jumps off the bed in victory, hunching over in laughter when he tripped over his feet and onto the floor. The both of you end up in tears, unaware the others were laughing from the security room as they watched the footage. 

* * *

 

**May**

 

_ Readers POV _

 

“FUCK, Steve! Take it easy will you?” He groaned as Steve pinned his left arm behind his back, leaving a struggling Bucky underneath him. You winced when Steve flipped him over his back and onto his stomach. Why did you agree to this? Watching Steve and Bucky do this made you regret your life choices. 

“You used to be good at this, Bucky, what’s the holdup?” Steve panted above him. 

“How about I shove a branch up your ass, Rogers? Now get off me, I’m injured.”

“Relax, old man, now, do what you remember. What would you do in this situation?” Steve was trying his absolute hardest on being stern with Bucky to get him back into shape, but it was hard when he was his best friend. 

“Um...let’s see, I’d leave him in the alleyway so he can get his ass kicked!” Bucky clearly was getting more frustrated as the time passed, not to mention Steve was getting irritated as well. 

“Oh just stop being a Weiner Soldier and do the defense move, Barnes!” Two heads jerked towards you, eyes wide as saucers. Bucky stared at you with darkened eyes, a look you’d normally be swooning over, but in this case, it had you slowly backing up to the door. He managed to get out of Steve’s grip and jump to his feet. 

“Aha! He’s [loose](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzlNmps0QVM)!”  Your hands shot in the air when Bucky successfully freed himself. The moment was short lived when he charged at you. You shrieked and ran behind Steve, hoping your friend would have your back. Of course,  _ that  _ didn’t help when you felt a pair of strong arms make their way around you. 

“Gotcha now! What’re you going to do to get out of this situation? Think, (Y/N), what would Steve do?” 

Acting out of instinct, you elbowed Bucky solar plex, stomping on his foot when his arms loosened. Swung around and decked him in the face, right on the nose, then lastly kicked him in his groin. Bucky fell to the ground in a heap, curling into a fetal position, cupping his balls gently, trying to find some sort of comfort. 

“I don’t know about Steve, but I’d [sing](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNJwxJXr2jc) to you.”   

Steve was howling with laughter, clutching his sides, his back hunching over. You joined in soon after, the sight of Bucky laying motionless on the floor, unable to move from his side was just too good. 

“I don’t know, (Y/N), but he’s singing now.” Another high pitched whine escaped from Bucky’s lips as he tried to move. 

“Shut up!” He yelled from the floor as he managed to shift up to his hands and knees. 

“Oh come on Buck, it can’t be that bad. I’ll teach it to you sometime, you have a great voice. Ooh, maybe you can sing soprano!” You clapped your hands, jumping up and down excitedly. Steve, however, was now on the floor gasping for air, laughing so hard tears ran down his face. 

“Ahahauu….nghg... _ shit _ …,” Bucky whined as he slowly made his way to his feet. His face went pale when he took a step. You snorted behind your hand, you felt bad for laughing at him, knowing that it painful, but you just couldn’t help it. Bucky glared at you and Steve. 

“I fucking hate you both.” He limped cautiously out of the training room, mumbling angrily to himself. Man, you couldn’t wait to come back to keep him company next time. 

You decided to spend the next few days with Nat and Wanda when Bucky thought it would be best if you weren’t present. Not wanting to get kneed again. You still felt bad for what happened, but you felt even worse when the rest of the team found out. It took three batches of chocolate chip cookies and a prank of Steve for Bucky to talk to you again. Luckily that fixed the problem, except he was still cautious when he hugged you from behind, not wanting you to ‘sing’ to him again. 

* * *

 

**June**

 

_ Readers POV _

  
  


“(Y/N), come on! You’re missing the best part!” Nat screamed from the living room.

 

“I’m coming, Nat, hold your horses!” You yelled back from the kitchen, filling the bowl with the freshly made popcorn. Quickly adding the butter and salt then making your way back to the room. Wanda eagerly took the bowl out of your hands and immediately started eating eat. The three of you decided to watch The Proposal, the scene where Margaret Tate, played by Sandra Bullock traps the dog into the bathroom. Right before she crashes into her assistant Andrew (Reynolds). Not long after that, you guys finished the movie and were now browsing to find a new one to watch. 

“How’s Bucky feeling now, (Y/N)?” Nat asked while Wanda continued to search. 

“Well, he can now hug me from behind without flinching,” you shrug, “so I guess that’s a good thing.” You curled your feet under you, wrapping a blanket around your legs grabbing the bowl of popcorn in the process. 

“But seriously, (Y/N), how is he? How are you both doing?” Nat faced you on the opposite end of the couch. Wanda stopped what she was doing and listened to you too. 

“I think we’re doing fine, I mean nothing bad’s happened yet. We’re taking it day by day and it’s great! He actually made me breakfast this morning, like breakfast and everything. He actually put it all out on a tray and  _ brought _ it into  _ my  _ room. Then he left.” 

You didn’t realize you were smiling, a warm fuzzy feeling filled your chest. The sight of seeing Bucky carrying a tray into your room, placing it on your lap, kissing your forehead then leaving, left you dumbfounded. Not once since you both decided to stay in separate rooms, have you both even went into the others. Not once. But the loving gesture confirmed it, you and Bucky were healing. The fact he remembered what your favorite flower was, how you liked your eggs, everything about it made your heart soar. Nat and Wanda smiled widely at you, excited about the news. 

* * *

 

**July**

 

_ Bucky’s POV _

 

“Do you really have to go? Isn’t it too soon?” I watched as (Y/N) paced the floor anxiously as I strapped into the rest of my gear. 

“(Y/N), Helen said I was fine to go back into the field, Steve says I’m ready too. In fact, I need to go back out there, Hydra’s not going to get rid of themselves.” I walked up to her, wrapping my arms around her waist making her stop. Her arms automatically snaked their way to my back, clutching the back of my vest. 

“I just don’t want to lose you again, Bucky. We’re finally getting back to where we just were. I love you, I can’t lose you. Not now. Not after everything we’ve been through.” Her muffled voice cracked as her shoulders began to shake. I pull her tighter against me, resting my chin on top of her head. 

“You’re not going to lose me, (Y/N), want to know why? Because I love you too.” 

\------ 

5 Hours Later

 

“Well hello, Mr. Barnes, or should I say welcome back, Winter Soldier. Back for more?” 

 

“Shut up.” I hiss through my teeth, aiming the gun at the man’s head. He continued on his work, making slow movements, smiling to himself every so often. “You think it’s funny that I have a gun pointed at you?” The man let out a laugh and shook his head. 

“Not at all, Mr. Barnes, in fact, it’s like fate or what you might call deja vu.” He continued talking as he made his way through some file cabinets at the back of the room. Pulling out a file spreading its contents on the table in front of me. “You see after you left the virus in our computers and after one of my men shot (Y/N) in the back, it got me thinking. You got yourself a strong girl there, Barnes.” I noticed him flip some photos around so they faced me. They were of (Y/N), from where we carried her back to the jet, to her in the wheelchair, down to the scar lining her back. My shoulders stiffened, my blood boiled at the realization that they’ve been watching her. 

“What do you want?” The grip on my gun loosened slightly but instantly tightened when he walked around the table. 

“We’ve come to take you back, it’s time for the Winter Soldier to change history once again.” I shook my head, taking a nervous step back when he kept walking towards me.

“I won’t hesitate to shoot you.” The barrel of my gun was now resting on his forehead. HIs smile widened as he gave me a glaring stare, daring me to pull the trigger. 

“If you really were going to shoot me, you would’ve done it by now. Of course, the Winter Soldier wouldn’t have hesitated. You’re growing soft on me.” I grabbed his neck with my left hand and slammed him against the wall. Pushing the gun back to his head. “But I’d think twice before you  _ actually _ pull the trigger.” The look in his eyes told me he was hiding something, so killing him now would be completely pointless.

“You know, it would be a shame for something to happen to poor Ms. (Y/N), now wouldn’t it?” He smiled when my hold on him loosened, he knew he had my attention then. “Let’s make a proposition, shall we? You let us bring Winter back and your precious girlfriend will be left alone. Of course, when we’re done with you, she’s actually going to leave you this time.” He was playing tricks on me, trying to get into my head, mess things up, turn my own thoughts against me. A pain shot through my head as memories came flying back. I managed to subdue them and turn my attention back to the man, still within my grasp. 

“Then you’re going to have to wait for a fucking long time.” The sound of a gun and the dropping of a bullet casing echoed throughout the room. I let go of his neck and let him drop to the floor with a thud, blood seeping out the hole in his head. Steve and Tony came running in shortly after, breathing heavily. 

“We heard the shot, are you alright?” They ask in unison, looking at the dead man at my feet back to me. I only nod in response, pushing past them and headed back to the jet. Not noticing the worried glance they gave each other when they saw the file on the table. I was so scared and I wasn’t sure what to do. 

* * *

 

**August**

 

_ Bucky’s POV _

 

So far, I thought I was able to act as if nothing was wrong when I got back from that mission last month. But how I was wrong, so wrong. I found myself jumping out of bed when my name was being screamed. I stood at the side of my bed breathless in front of Steve, who had now turned the lights on. 

“Bucky, what the fuck happened?” I look around my room the room anxiously, my eyes land on the side of the bed where she once was. I’m struggling to focus, the shift between reality and imagination are making things difficult to grasp onto anything.

“Bucky, talk to me. What’s wrong?” Steve’s now standing in front of me, gripping my shoulders. I start to shake, sitting on the bed before I could lose my balance.

“W-Where’s... _ shit _ …(Y/N), where’s (Y/N)?” I finally manage to choke the words out.

“She’s out with girls, she’s fine. Do you want me to call her?” I shake my head, running my hands through my tangled hair. “No, d-don’t call her. S-She can’t know.” Steve catches on pretty quick, talking to me again, his voice drowning the others. 

“What did he tell you, Bucky? What exactly happened in that room?” After I promised (Y/N) I wouldn’t keep secrets from her again, this was one I really didn’t want to tell her. At least not myself. 

“They wanted Winter back. That if I didn’t come back willingly, they’d take her. So I shot him. I-I almost...I actually thought about it, Steve. My brains so fucked up I can’t decipher what’s real or not. I-I don’t know what to do S-Steve….”

\-------

I can tell I’m starting to distance myself from everyone, pushing away any form of conversation. I kept to myself, avoided those who came near me. I grew restless, tired, hardly touched any food during meals. I was slipping and I was slipping fast. (Y/N) became more worried as the days passed, always asking Steve to update her as soon as he left my room. It was always the same message, ‘I don’t want to talk to her, not yet. I’m not ready.’ It got to the point where she ended up begging Tony to place a couch across the hall so she could sit outside. Days turned into weeks as (Y/N) would sit on the couch practically all day to see if I’d come out. Or until someone dragged her back to her room to actually get some sleep.

 

But little did she know, I was laying on the floor just behind the door, desperately wanting to hold her. 

**Author's Note:**

> I am so sorry.


End file.
